Lord, how often….

Matthew 6:14-15 For if you forgive others their trespasses your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will our Father forgive your trespasses.

The ordeal began in May of 2010 when driving home from a business conference in Las Vegas. I received a phone call while passing through Salt Lake City, Utah from my son Matthew. He asked if I had heard about what happened to his brother Andy? That is when I was given the news of Andy being charged with premeditated murder of an Afghan civilian. It’s funny how the world can suddenly stop spinning so quickly.

The ordeal began January of 2010 in a far away land while my son was serving in the US Army. The culmination of this experience was Andy accepting a plea of guilty to unpremeditated murder at a court martial at Fort Lewis, Washington in September of 2011. The process of stating his guilt, and awaiting to be sentenced stretched over two days. In the midst of this trial was a gift straight from God. Andy and I were given an opportunity to talk about important things before he was sentenced and sent to prison. The gift was the opportunity to have a very good talk with Andy about forgiveness. This was not a very easy talk because each of us had long standing resentments towards those who initiated the horrible sequence of events that started this whole ordeal, those who were accusing him of many things and those who were prosecuting him while leaving the leaders unpunished. I had long prayed about what to say if this opportunity was presented. I had prayed that the words would be given to me so that what I said would be the right thing in that moment.  Our talk focused on the importance of forgiving all of those involved. It is paramount that forgiveness must, absolutely must, be undertaken. The parable of the unforgiving servant from Matthew 18:21-35 is a superb depiction of why this is important. The parable is too long to include here, but dear friends of the Risen Savior you should take the time to read it carefully. There is just so much that hits home in so very many aspects of our lives. As we forgive, so are we forgiven.

To forgive is an imperative. To continue to do so is difficult, but also just as important. This can be especially difficult when those you are forgiving continue to wrong you. There are two points to consider. Jesus tells Peter in Matthew 18:22 they must be forgiven “seventy times seven.” The point is not to start counting so that if you reach 491 you do not have to forgive, rather to just let it go. For if you are counting, then you really have not forgiven. A subtle point, but a big point to consider.  The second point is not a scripture based, at least not one that I can find a reference for. If you do not forgive someone, then they are living inside your head rent free. Your ability to find peace will be vastly diminished if you do not let God handle it. You will deny yourself the opportunity to embrace the peace from God that surpasses all our earthly understanding (Philippians 4:7). It is a peace that we so desperately need in our lives.  Embrace forgiveness and enjoy the freedom that comes with it.

I believe of all the talks I have enjoyed with Andy, that our talk on forgiveness was one of the best, if not the very best. It was meaningful in so many ways to both of us. Partly because it was the last one we will have for several years unencumbered by distance or limitations of the environment to talk openly and freely. It helped Andy, and I, move forward in processing through with this tragedy in our lives. Clearly the Lord saw there was a need for our talking through this issue, and he gave us this marvelous gift. And for that I am deeply humbled, and will be forever grateful.

PRAYER: Lord and giver of life, You remind us daily of the importance of many things in our lives. These reminders come in many forms. Some reminders are like a huge billboard along the side of a road, others are like a faint whisper into our ears. The reminder to forgive others is one which we need to be given often and loudly. Your Son, Jesus, paid a terrible price on the cross for the sake of forgiving all sinners. For that we are eternally grateful. Help us as we go about our lives to practice that same forgiveness in our own lives. Let the nothing dwell in our hearts and minds that harbors resentment towards those who have trespassed against us. We ask for Your help in Your Holy Spirit to have the strength and faith to live that type of live. We ask this in the name of Jesus, Amen.